things joe says

• 2012-07-27 0 notes

  My stomach feels sick… Do you have TUMs or Pepto Bismol?… I like the taste of Pepto Bismol.

• 2012-06-10 4 notes

  Wine and I have a love-love relationship.

• 2012-05-17 0 notes

  1. Joe: (talking about how his baby teeth are bothering him)
  2. Mandie: You should go to the dentist.
  3. Joe: No, I'll just floss my teeth more.

• 2012-05-16 0 notes

  I think our check is in the oven.

  — waiting forever for our waiter in Naples

• 2012-04-11 1 note

  I spend more time on craigslist now than I do on tumblr.

• 2012-04-08 0 notes

  It’s so good. I wanna throw it up, it’s so good.

  — on chocolate milk

• 2012-03-13 0 notes

  Snow is my downfall.

  — In regards to Seattle’s bi-polar weather today in the midst of studying for finals

• 2011-12-07 2 notes

  Climbing Lycabettus Hill

  1. Joe: Why don't you want that much Coke?
  2. Dorothy: 'Cause I'm gonna have to pee once I get up there
  3. Joe: Pee up on the mountain, that's what they're for
  4. Dorothy: Really Joe? Mountains are for peeing?
  5. Joe: Peeing and skiing- that's what I say

• 2011-11-22 2 notes

  This mirror is distorted… you look skinny.

  — to Dorothy

• 2011-11-15 1 note

  Thisss guy…

  — while pointing to himself